So I don't feel to evil... my first thoughts were pity- then the obligatory 'couldn't have happened to a nicer guy' sarcasm... then more sincere pity...
My uncle- who I sometimes hate- despite the fact he is my uncle who I love in that complex way you only can with family... sheesh
so he buys a new computer desk, really nice thing, costs almost two hundred and he manages to buy it for 50... but on the way home the wind scoops it out of his truck and onto the street at just the right angle to shatter the sucker...
ouch... just... ouch...
So I don't feel too evil because I had the pity moment first... xD
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Saturday, May 23, 2009
non-violent violent outbursts
so yeah- haven't posted in a while- big fat deal- not a major blogger anyway.... not like I have a fanbase here- a lil' on ff.net- but blah
what with the suckie economy I find myself jobless- have been as such for the last two months... and i try yet another pointless online application- to find not a one of these things likes to accept my resume in the application- they have a spot where it asks me to upload my resume- and the first one I try- I find I have to reformat my resume from 07's docx to o3's doc, figured I'd get back to that one since I didn't have the programs to do so on the computer I was on at the time- this other one- I already had it as a doc- and it specificially says it takes microsoft word, txt or html... so I try it as doc first, and it won't accept the file, try the docx no... convert to single page webpage- no- try to just flat html it- and of course word tacks on useless files that i can't send, and the file refuses to stay put without them.... my god I want to find the webmasters who made these forms and slap them upside the head...
and speaking of righteous fury... my uncle managed to find a new way to piss me off... as I'm gathering shit in my room so I can move it out of the way and vacuum, he comes up to me in his self-important voice and tells me "he doesn't want to start a fight but he wants to tell me 'he's not fooled' and if I really wanted a job I'd have one by now" and I sit there restraining myself from his throat....
two fucking months, my credit card company is calling me daily- I at least got my student loans to back off until december... but credit card company is really antaganizing me which doesn't earn them an iota of sympathy from me- can't draw blood from a turnip or money from the broke...
my ass I haven't tried.... fucking hell- I even degraded myseld enough to go back to jack in the box- and I quit them just before they managed to officially become the worst Jack in the Box in the Nation.... and even those fuckers won't give me a straight awnser- oh the manager acts so enthused like he wants to hire me- but I keep going back three days straight to ask him if he's even fucking bothered to look up if he CAN hire me back because I quit with less than two weeks notice last time and the prior manager might have tacked on no hire status... finally after three days he tells someone else to tell me he might call back in a week or so....
the only place i haven't tried is WalMart and that's because I have ethical disagreements with thier employment methods- all part time- and absolutly no overtime even if it's actually needed... they will negate breaks before they give you overtime.... fuckers...
what with the suckie economy I find myself jobless- have been as such for the last two months... and i try yet another pointless online application- to find not a one of these things likes to accept my resume in the application- they have a spot where it asks me to upload my resume- and the first one I try- I find I have to reformat my resume from 07's docx to o3's doc, figured I'd get back to that one since I didn't have the programs to do so on the computer I was on at the time- this other one- I already had it as a doc- and it specificially says it takes microsoft word, txt or html... so I try it as doc first, and it won't accept the file, try the docx no... convert to single page webpage- no- try to just flat html it- and of course word tacks on useless files that i can't send, and the file refuses to stay put without them.... my god I want to find the webmasters who made these forms and slap them upside the head...
and speaking of righteous fury... my uncle managed to find a new way to piss me off... as I'm gathering shit in my room so I can move it out of the way and vacuum, he comes up to me in his self-important voice and tells me "he doesn't want to start a fight but he wants to tell me 'he's not fooled' and if I really wanted a job I'd have one by now" and I sit there restraining myself from his throat....
two fucking months, my credit card company is calling me daily- I at least got my student loans to back off until december... but credit card company is really antaganizing me which doesn't earn them an iota of sympathy from me- can't draw blood from a turnip or money from the broke...
my ass I haven't tried.... fucking hell- I even degraded myseld enough to go back to jack in the box- and I quit them just before they managed to officially become the worst Jack in the Box in the Nation.... and even those fuckers won't give me a straight awnser- oh the manager acts so enthused like he wants to hire me- but I keep going back three days straight to ask him if he's even fucking bothered to look up if he CAN hire me back because I quit with less than two weeks notice last time and the prior manager might have tacked on no hire status... finally after three days he tells someone else to tell me he might call back in a week or so....
the only place i haven't tried is WalMart and that's because I have ethical disagreements with thier employment methods- all part time- and absolutly no overtime even if it's actually needed... they will negate breaks before they give you overtime.... fuckers...
Friday, April 3, 2009
Insert random and pointless swearing
How well do you ever know a person...
and when a person says you don't really know then- how often are they just lashing out...
god fucking crap shit and hell...
all that deep and personal conversation shot to purgatory- cause at least if it were shot to hell I could write it off...
instead I get to repair a bridge without a boat or paddle to keep the stream at bay...
fuck me...
fuck me sideways with a chainsaw...
and when a person says you don't really know then- how often are they just lashing out...
god fucking crap shit and hell...
all that deep and personal conversation shot to purgatory- cause at least if it were shot to hell I could write it off...
instead I get to repair a bridge without a boat or paddle to keep the stream at bay...
fuck me...
fuck me sideways with a chainsaw...
Cafe for someone who hates coffee
My laptop is still a half-functional pile of crap- now with stickykeys because for once in my life I spilled Energy Drink on it... I may have to take it apart and put it back together for a third time to un-sticky the keys...
But I digress from the point I wanted to get to... whatever that was...
I am now job-less again- and sick of my family riding me over it...
My fuck-tard of an uncle bitching how where he works people are getting jobs every day- >.> he works as the DES- yippy for him that he can find country-bumpkin dickface a job that probably suits is IQ... I've done fast food and loath it- can do it again if I have too- but only as a last resort- I just got fired from Circkle K- forgive me if I wish to avoid convinence for a little while too... I wouldn't mind bartending- but I don't even know how to make a fucking martini- and there's so much to figure out I don't know where to start- nevermind that I'm not sure I want the legal responcibility of telling people they're too drunk to drink...
Most of the other places I've been hitting aren't hiring, and even the mines are laying people off- which I'm too scrawny to do anyway- so I really wish he'd just shut his fucking mouth- and of course- he doesn't even have the balls to say it to my face anymore- I just hear him bitching to the rest of the family because he's so loud he wakes me up...
So fuck him... he told me check out this list of jobs- 98% of which required me to have a driver's licience which I don't- and franky don't want- I hate driving- especially cause I can't do so worth a damn because the idea of stering a quarter to half ton chunk of metal at highway speeds with only the benifit of visual and limited auditory imput strikes me as bordering on suicidal...
And of course ALL of the jobs were state- which implys they want someone who plans to stick around more than six months or however fucking long it teakes to finally get my ass out of this 'fuck you shit' town...
>_>
Wow, I've been a lot more profane in my blog lately and I'm not sure why- probably all the fruitless rantlung....
So I'm turning 25 this year and finding myself crushing on a 16 year old I met online... this comes after last year I dated and took the virginity of a girl who only turned 18 shortly after said event...at least she was only a couple weeks from 18 when we had sex- nevermind that her family would kill me if they knew- nevermind on that that it was her idea too- I told her she should wait until she was really ready- not just wanted it right then... but I relented, and I gave in...
and a couple weeks later her prior emotional damage is finally sufficient to drive a wedge between us and I give up on her- that was july... this is half a year later- while I constantly talk to this one girl who lives in Canada (Blame Canada- xD j/k) and even admit to her that I have an interest- and of course she has such low self esteem she doesn't believe me and thinks me a pervert- to which I can only tell her I have a tendency to join people's minds in the gutter rather than visit the place by myself...
but of course WIFI in the cafe is the only way I reach her online- so we chat over TXT most of the time- when her two hour time differnce added to my different sleep schedule doesn't have us frequently missing each other...
she was down in florida last week- which just made me miss FL all the more xD
but still the two hour time difference...
I dunno- she so god damn impatient but I can't seem to just blow her off...
I'm only attracted to her for her mind- though given the chance (which is to say permision and same zip code) I would totally fuck her.... she's always telling me how at 16 she could be living on her own- yet she still lives with her parents who she constantly complains of (and half the time when I get more than sterotypical teenage bitching from her about why she's upset- I can't help sympathy with her parents- though I do feel from my limited exposure of her that they don't granter her nearly enough privacy- admittedly she does abuse a great deal of what she gets...
At least I didn't NEED the lock I didn't have on my door...
god sometimes I wish we were in the same room so I could strangle her- and other times I wish we were in the same room so I could fuck her brains out... instead I just get to fuck off and piss and moan...
But I digress from the point I wanted to get to... whatever that was...
I am now job-less again- and sick of my family riding me over it...
My fuck-tard of an uncle bitching how where he works people are getting jobs every day- >.> he works as the DES- yippy for him that he can find country-bumpkin dickface a job that probably suits is IQ... I've done fast food and loath it- can do it again if I have too- but only as a last resort- I just got fired from Circkle K- forgive me if I wish to avoid convinence for a little while too... I wouldn't mind bartending- but I don't even know how to make a fucking martini- and there's so much to figure out I don't know where to start- nevermind that I'm not sure I want the legal responcibility of telling people they're too drunk to drink...
Most of the other places I've been hitting aren't hiring, and even the mines are laying people off- which I'm too scrawny to do anyway- so I really wish he'd just shut his fucking mouth- and of course- he doesn't even have the balls to say it to my face anymore- I just hear him bitching to the rest of the family because he's so loud he wakes me up...
So fuck him... he told me check out this list of jobs- 98% of which required me to have a driver's licience which I don't- and franky don't want- I hate driving- especially cause I can't do so worth a damn because the idea of stering a quarter to half ton chunk of metal at highway speeds with only the benifit of visual and limited auditory imput strikes me as bordering on suicidal...
And of course ALL of the jobs were state- which implys they want someone who plans to stick around more than six months or however fucking long it teakes to finally get my ass out of this 'fuck you shit' town...
>_>
Wow, I've been a lot more profane in my blog lately and I'm not sure why- probably all the fruitless rantlung....
So I'm turning 25 this year and finding myself crushing on a 16 year old I met online... this comes after last year I dated and took the virginity of a girl who only turned 18 shortly after said event...at least she was only a couple weeks from 18 when we had sex- nevermind that her family would kill me if they knew- nevermind on that that it was her idea too- I told her she should wait until she was really ready- not just wanted it right then... but I relented, and I gave in...
and a couple weeks later her prior emotional damage is finally sufficient to drive a wedge between us and I give up on her- that was july... this is half a year later- while I constantly talk to this one girl who lives in Canada (Blame Canada- xD j/k) and even admit to her that I have an interest- and of course she has such low self esteem she doesn't believe me and thinks me a pervert- to which I can only tell her I have a tendency to join people's minds in the gutter rather than visit the place by myself...
but of course WIFI in the cafe is the only way I reach her online- so we chat over TXT most of the time- when her two hour time differnce added to my different sleep schedule doesn't have us frequently missing each other...
she was down in florida last week- which just made me miss FL all the more xD
but still the two hour time difference...
I dunno- she so god damn impatient but I can't seem to just blow her off...
I'm only attracted to her for her mind- though given the chance (which is to say permision and same zip code) I would totally fuck her.... she's always telling me how at 16 she could be living on her own- yet she still lives with her parents who she constantly complains of (and half the time when I get more than sterotypical teenage bitching from her about why she's upset- I can't help sympathy with her parents- though I do feel from my limited exposure of her that they don't granter her nearly enough privacy- admittedly she does abuse a great deal of what she gets...
At least I didn't NEED the lock I didn't have on my door...
god sometimes I wish we were in the same room so I could strangle her- and other times I wish we were in the same room so I could fuck her brains out... instead I just get to fuck off and piss and moan...
Thursday, February 5, 2009
I Hate Sombody Too
Kudos to anyone who gets the song reference....
Anyway, to date I had avoided obvious references to anything that is me, because I have pictures of me and no real attempt to hide who I am, as such anyone who knows me theoretically could find this... realistically, the only people who actually know who I am will only find this by links I have provided....
as such, I really don't care anymore....
I want to rant with no regard for responsibility or interest in anybody else's opinion of this... I'm feeling reckless and irresponsible... in short, I'm pissed off....
I feel for the sake of anyone actually still reading at this point I ought to fill in some background information so my pointless ranting makes some semblance of sense....
In my first senior year- of which I had two owning to my general apathy to all things public education- My father was arrested, given unreasonable bail amounts- that is to say as good as denied bail despite being an obvious non-flight risk (for gods sake a lawyer told him up front before charges were formally pressed he was fucked and might as well skip out then- and he didn't...), as such soon after, lacking dad's income we had to sell the house and move- initially to my father's parents- and eventually again to my mother parents... where I graduated finally... and began college as was the plan, and my main reason for disinterest in High School- really I was a college boy before I even enrolled... in many ways at least... I only wanted the diploma instead of a GED as a formality... (irony, though the GED takes more work, the Diploma is more respected..)
and things were fine- until my uncle, who generally fucked his own life up- got dumped by his fourth wife because he was busted for illegal drug use, and lost his nursing licence... and eventually after a few more shitty twists and turns in his life that of course were all his own dumbshit fault (clarification- he his highly intelligent, his just plain ignorant, see earlier rants if you don't know the difference...), and he ends up moving in with my grandmother too... who by now, is living with her handicapped son because the other son who said son had been living with, had died, in fact by now her husband was also dead... so, a house built with two handicapped people in mind, now housing five- including myself who was not there good portions of the year away at college...
I think that's enough background for now- this year I wasn't able to enroll in college again due to the fact I'm in debt up my ass... my own fault of course- but I'm working on it...
my mother is of course, lazier than I, where else would I have learned it, she has on occasion dubbed herself 'Queen of Excuses'....
That doesn't excuse my uncle for his inability to be a reasonable human being...
He does not seem to appreciate his situation... he's plumb fucked himself and is lucky his has family willing to cover his lousy ass and put up with his arrogant shit... he wants respect... I tried that- I got nothing for it, and now all he's earned from me is my discontent and rage... he's lucky all he gets from me is passive indifference, and the world is lucky I couldn't harm a living soul.... it's just not in me to be anything worse than a passive aggressive backstabber...
this is the short version rather than the rant I had in mind before I did all my other errands today like a somewhat responsible person....
I hope this promotion I might be getting gets me off graveyard shift... staying up past 6am murders my sleep cycle, especially since I have to try and live some semblance of an otherwise normal hours life on my days off...
Anyway, to date I had avoided obvious references to anything that is me, because I have pictures of me and no real attempt to hide who I am, as such anyone who knows me theoretically could find this... realistically, the only people who actually know who I am will only find this by links I have provided....
as such, I really don't care anymore....
I want to rant with no regard for responsibility or interest in anybody else's opinion of this... I'm feeling reckless and irresponsible... in short, I'm pissed off....
I feel for the sake of anyone actually still reading at this point I ought to fill in some background information so my pointless ranting makes some semblance of sense....
In my first senior year- of which I had two owning to my general apathy to all things public education- My father was arrested, given unreasonable bail amounts- that is to say as good as denied bail despite being an obvious non-flight risk (for gods sake a lawyer told him up front before charges were formally pressed he was fucked and might as well skip out then- and he didn't...), as such soon after, lacking dad's income we had to sell the house and move- initially to my father's parents- and eventually again to my mother parents... where I graduated finally... and began college as was the plan, and my main reason for disinterest in High School- really I was a college boy before I even enrolled... in many ways at least... I only wanted the diploma instead of a GED as a formality... (irony, though the GED takes more work, the Diploma is more respected..)
and things were fine- until my uncle, who generally fucked his own life up- got dumped by his fourth wife because he was busted for illegal drug use, and lost his nursing licence... and eventually after a few more shitty twists and turns in his life that of course were all his own dumbshit fault (clarification- he his highly intelligent, his just plain ignorant, see earlier rants if you don't know the difference...), and he ends up moving in with my grandmother too... who by now, is living with her handicapped son because the other son who said son had been living with, had died, in fact by now her husband was also dead... so, a house built with two handicapped people in mind, now housing five- including myself who was not there good portions of the year away at college...
I think that's enough background for now- this year I wasn't able to enroll in college again due to the fact I'm in debt up my ass... my own fault of course- but I'm working on it...
my mother is of course, lazier than I, where else would I have learned it, she has on occasion dubbed herself 'Queen of Excuses'....
That doesn't excuse my uncle for his inability to be a reasonable human being...
He does not seem to appreciate his situation... he's plumb fucked himself and is lucky his has family willing to cover his lousy ass and put up with his arrogant shit... he wants respect... I tried that- I got nothing for it, and now all he's earned from me is my discontent and rage... he's lucky all he gets from me is passive indifference, and the world is lucky I couldn't harm a living soul.... it's just not in me to be anything worse than a passive aggressive backstabber...
this is the short version rather than the rant I had in mind before I did all my other errands today like a somewhat responsible person....
I hope this promotion I might be getting gets me off graveyard shift... staying up past 6am murders my sleep cycle, especially since I have to try and live some semblance of an otherwise normal hours life on my days off...
Thursday, September 11, 2008
delays and such
Sorry it's been so long since I posted- to anyone who actually reads this anyway >.>
the lack of internet at home anymore has made it a real bitch to post- when I actually have something to say I can't get online to post it, and when I'm online to post I don't have much to say...
I'm still in a piss-poor excuse for a town, I'm still in too much debt to get back to taking classes, and I'm currently unemployed again... though at least things are looking up finally on that last one... Circle K is hard up for people, and as soon as my background check goes through this time they should hire me- course they said that last time too... but I don't think they ever actually got to sumbitting the nessecary paperwork like they did this time- I watched them do it this time....
on a personal note- I refuse to do fast food again unless I know the place is properly staffed...
do you have any idea how annoying it is to hear a person order 30-50 bucks of food and bitch when it's not done the second he hits the window....
even when well staffed it's going to take more then the aleged 5 minutes to get that much food ready because you can only cook so much at once....
and if I ever make another one of Jack and the Boxes tacos again it'll be too soon... whoever thought it was smart to deep fry tacos deserves to have their hands deep fried with the tacos...
the lack of internet at home anymore has made it a real bitch to post- when I actually have something to say I can't get online to post it, and when I'm online to post I don't have much to say...
I'm still in a piss-poor excuse for a town, I'm still in too much debt to get back to taking classes, and I'm currently unemployed again... though at least things are looking up finally on that last one... Circle K is hard up for people, and as soon as my background check goes through this time they should hire me- course they said that last time too... but I don't think they ever actually got to sumbitting the nessecary paperwork like they did this time- I watched them do it this time....
on a personal note- I refuse to do fast food again unless I know the place is properly staffed...
do you have any idea how annoying it is to hear a person order 30-50 bucks of food and bitch when it's not done the second he hits the window....
even when well staffed it's going to take more then the aleged 5 minutes to get that much food ready because you can only cook so much at once....
and if I ever make another one of Jack and the Boxes tacos again it'll be too soon... whoever thought it was smart to deep fry tacos deserves to have their hands deep fried with the tacos...
Thursday, February 7, 2008
~Insert Sarcastic comment here~
well, Guess I'm not getting an AA here...
yesterday was just one of those days... everytime I go to do something- you have to do 12 other things first- and when it all finnaly laid itself out- I can't do any of it because there's a hold on my account here because I haven't finished paying for my classes and my dorm... and the deadline was 4:30...
and why in gods name would they FORCE me to talk with an adviser- geaz- like I can't fucking READ THE INSTRUCTIONS myself.... but oh no- college is about learning- so we have to TALK to you before you can do ANYTHING....
either way- I'm not comming back next semester- and I have to be enrolled HERE to get my degree HERE... which makes sense- but reguardless- I think I have to pay to get it at a university- so I guess I'll go back to plan B and just jump to the BA...
don't get my wrong, I've had fun this semester and last- but I really shouldn't have come back- I should have returned from Disney and just gone straight to ASU...
yesterday was just one of those days... everytime I go to do something- you have to do 12 other things first- and when it all finnaly laid itself out- I can't do any of it because there's a hold on my account here because I haven't finished paying for my classes and my dorm... and the deadline was 4:30...
and why in gods name would they FORCE me to talk with an adviser- geaz- like I can't fucking READ THE INSTRUCTIONS myself.... but oh no- college is about learning- so we have to TALK to you before you can do ANYTHING....
either way- I'm not comming back next semester- and I have to be enrolled HERE to get my degree HERE... which makes sense- but reguardless- I think I have to pay to get it at a university- so I guess I'll go back to plan B and just jump to the BA...
don't get my wrong, I've had fun this semester and last- but I really shouldn't have come back- I should have returned from Disney and just gone straight to ASU...
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