Cafe for someone who hates coffee

My laptop is still a half-functional pile of crap- now with stickykeys because for once in my life I spilled Energy Drink on it... I may have to take it apart and put it back together for a third time to un-sticky the keys...

But I digress from the point I wanted to get to... whatever that was...
I am now job-less again- and sick of my family riding me over it...
My fuck-tard of an uncle bitching how where he works people are getting jobs every day- >.> he works as the DES- yippy for him that he can find country-bumpkin dickface a job that probably suits is IQ... I've done fast food and loath it- can do it again if I have too- but only as a last resort- I just got fired from Circkle K- forgive me if I wish to avoid convinence for a little while too... I wouldn't mind bartending- but I don't even know how to make a fucking martini- and there's so much to figure out I don't know where to start- nevermind that I'm not sure I want the legal responcibility of telling people they're too drunk to drink...

Most of the other places I've been hitting aren't hiring, and even the mines are laying people off- which I'm too scrawny to do anyway- so I really wish he'd just shut his fucking mouth- and of course- he doesn't even have the balls to say it to my face anymore- I just hear him bitching to the rest of the family because he's so loud he wakes me up...
So fuck him... he told me check out this list of jobs- 98% of which required me to have a driver's licience which I don't- and franky don't want- I hate driving- especially cause I can't do so worth a damn because the idea of stering a quarter to half ton chunk of metal at highway speeds with only the benifit of visual and limited auditory imput strikes me as bordering on suicidal...

And of course ALL of the jobs were state- which implys they want someone who plans to stick around more than six months or however fucking long it teakes to finally get my ass out of this 'fuck you shit' town...


>_>

Wow, I've been a lot more profane in my blog lately and I'm not sure why- probably all the fruitless rantlung....
So I'm turning 25 this year and finding myself crushing on a 16 year old I met online... this comes after last year I dated and took the virginity of a girl who only turned 18 shortly after said event...at least she was only a couple weeks from 18 when we had sex- nevermind that her family would kill me if they knew- nevermind on that that it was her idea too- I told her she should wait until she was really ready- not just wanted it right then... but I relented, and I gave in...
and a couple weeks later her prior emotional damage is finally sufficient to drive a wedge between us and I give up on her- that was july... this is half a year later- while I constantly talk to this one girl who lives in Canada (Blame Canada- xD j/k) and even admit to her that I have an interest- and of course she has such low self esteem she doesn't believe me and thinks me a pervert- to which I can only tell her I have a tendency to join people's minds in the gutter rather than visit the place by myself...

but of course WIFI in the cafe is the only way I reach her online- so we chat over TXT most of the time- when her two hour time differnce added to my different sleep schedule doesn't have us frequently missing each other...
she was down in florida last week- which just made me miss FL all the more xD
but still the two hour time difference...

I dunno- she so god damn impatient but I can't seem to just blow her off...
I'm only attracted to her for her mind- though given the chance (which is to say permision and same zip code) I would totally fuck her.... she's always telling me how at 16 she could be living on her own- yet she still lives with her parents who she constantly complains of (and half the time when I get more than sterotypical teenage bitching from her about why she's upset- I can't help sympathy with her parents- though I do feel from my limited exposure of her that they don't granter her nearly enough privacy- admittedly she does abuse a great deal of what she gets...
At least I didn't NEED the lock I didn't have on my door...

god sometimes I wish we were in the same room so I could strangle her- and other times I wish we were in the same room so I could fuck her brains out... instead I just get to fuck off and piss and moan...